Nothing's funnier than naked -- Popular sins, explained -- Sexy cartoon god -- Tiny dainty baby lady -- Evening of carnal delights as envisioned by my ten-year-old self -- Welcome to Ass Planet -- I'm a clog bitch now -- Incredible vibrating teen -- Beware the howler -- Poor woman's Steve Irwin.
Summary
A collection of humorous essays chronicle the author's pursuit of perfection and quest to be everybody's favorite.